I’ve slept 3 hours since Sunday when I woke up at 9am to start studying for finals…1 more final and I can finally crash and go to bed forever.
So last year I was talking to this boy and hooking up with him, and long story shirt we were both drunk and said mean shit and he stopped talking to me after being a complete fucking dickhead. Well about 2 months ago he started talking to me again saying random little irrelevant things. Well basically I asked him “why the hell are you talking to me?” And he eventually came back and apologized for everything and said he missed me. Well truth be told I miss him too so I guess now were talking again? I can tell he’s trying to make up for what he did wrong so I’m giving him a chance and it’s not like I didn’t fuck up too.
But the worst part of all of this is, it’s finals week and I am so stressed out but all I can think about is him. I honestly forgot what it was like to have feelings for someone. And what an inconvenient time when I have so much schoolwork to focus on. Damn. How do you get someone off your mind?
I wish I had a boy to cuddle with.
Like have so many blankets on the bed and be all warm and cozy in your comfiest pjs and have a boy to cuddle with as you fall asleep. You don’t even have to be embracing, just the feel of having another person touching your body when you’re asleep is so comforting. I miss that feeling.
I’m gonna be honest and say I truly don’t understand people crying over an ex…cus I’m like whatever bitch it doesn’t phase me but that’s probably because I’m an emotionless bitch
Inside and out.
I have decided recently that I want to get the outline of a doe for a tattoo. I’m still considering where but I want this because the doe is the patronous that was sent to Harry Potter by Severus Snape in his time of need. I have been considering getting something pertaining to the the spell expecto patronum for a while but could not decide what. The main reason I want to get something involving the spell expecto patronum is because that is the spell you use when all the bad things are coming to suck the good out of you, and you have to concentrate on the good for the bad to go away. I’m always such a negative person, and my depression gets the most of me a lot of time so I want this is reminder to think about the good, and forget the bad. I’m obviously a huge Harry Potter fan so this tattoo has the meaning I want and is from something that I have always loved. I decided on the doe really because Harry always though Severus hated him, but he sent the doe to help Harry and I have to remind myself that things might not always turn out the way we think…someone we think doesn’t like us could care for us very much. This is really important for me to remember because I get caught up thinking that my friends hate and they don’t want me around..but I know it’s not true. So yeah, that’s the tattoo I finally decided I wanted…don’t know if I’d get go through with it cus I’m not a huge fan of tattoos in general but maybe I’ll be ballsy and just do it ;)
My sorority is going through recruitment right now…so I’ve been swamped, and basically feel like dying so I haven’t been on.
I really wish I was pretty.
I will pay someone to pack my stuff for me…because this is honestly the worst.
You sexy motherfucker, smoking your cigarette and drinking straight from the wine bottle. Your raspy voice, and the way you play guitar. I could love you so much. I could fall deeply in love with you if only you’d let me.